Your Life on Purpose 6l6n46

On today’s episode, I’d like to share with you one lesson I learned while living like a monk. I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned it before on this show, but this last winter I spent a few days at Zen Mountain Monastery in the Catskill mountains living like a monk. During that stay, time slowed down to a caterpillar crawl and days felt like years. In a good way. Why? Because with the monk life, every second seems to be ed for and everything seems to focus on the present, working to pull in the tangled ball of yarn that makes up our thoughts. Who knew non-thinking could cause time to slow down? I will be short and to the point like the espresso I’m sipping. On this episode, let’s cxplore a bit of zen philosophy to be more present in the moment. We start with a glass of ice cubes. ——- Imagine you’re on a plane and you ask a stewardess for a glass of water. A minute later she comes back with a cup of ice and hands it to you. You have had quite a long day, are tired, and just want some water to cool you down.  Frustrated with the ice cubes, you ask the stewardess:“What am I supposed to do with this!?” The stewardess replies, “Just wait.” —   Okay…. So, what does all this Yoda talk mean? What’s the point of this story, which I first heard from a zen monk. When we let the mind go on its own, we can easily go throughout an entire day thinking about the future and reflecting on the past all while ignoring the beauty in the present. So often, we can get carried away in the day-to-day that we lose sight of the now. When we want a glass of water and get ice cubes, the idea of waiting for that ice to melt into water can drive us mad. So we move on looking for water when water was right in front of us the whole time. Consider watching some ice cubes melt into a glass of water. Many people, including myself, would go mad watching the small drips that melt into liquid. I have so much to do…I can’t wait for THIS… Unhappy with the ice cubes, we go off looking for water in other places and forget that we had what we asked for all along. We just needed to let go. Zen philosophy calls this mindset “Muddy Water”. Like the ice cubes, our mind can be hardened to think a certain way so that we are full to the brim with muddy water or hardened like an ice cube. Our mind thrashes in the water, stirring up the mud from below, when all we need to do to reach clarity is let the mud settle to the bottom. Or let the ice cubes melt into amorphous water. When our mind is like water we are more open to go with the flow and make decisions with a clear open mind. If we learn to let go of the ice cubes, we’ll always have as much water as we need. , everything you need in this life is either with you now or well on its way. Thank you so much for listening. I wish you a beautiful day, full of love, light, and adventure.

As a kid, I was obsessed with Monty Python’s The Holy Grail. So much so that the obsession grew from clanking together coconuts as a teenager with my buddy Alan to studying Arthurian legend in my college studies. Even my professor thought I was a bit ridiculous. “You’re that kid in high school who would clank coconuts together, right?” she once asked.  And she was right. On a random cycling trip to Barcelona, I discovered that one of our routes outside Barcelona took us through the mountains where the grail is now thought to be buried. Did I look for The Holy Grail then? You betcha. And I seriously thought I found it when I came upon a tiny little 10th century chapel in the Pyrenees. But Alas, there was no grail to be found. I am one of many intrigued by the grail, however. The Holy Grail has been an obsession for questers throughout all of history. The Knights Templar searched high and low for The Holy Grail during The Crusades and Cistercian Monks rifled through ancient texts to search for clues, as well.   Heck, one man — the 12th Century French poet Chretien De Troyes — ended his story of The Holy Grail mid-sentence (yes, really) while writing the Arthurian legend of Perceval, the legendary knight who saw The Holy Grail while dining with The Fisher King. Legend has it, Chretien De Troyes died while writing because he was about to share a secret too powerful to share with the world. Seriously, I can’t make this stuff up. What is “The Holy Grail”? Most literalists say a cup — the cup used by Jesus Christ at The Last Supper — while others say a well like the fountain of youth. Unfortunately, no cup (or well or fountain) has ever been found. The evil Heinrich Himmler, Hitler’s right-hand henchman, thought he came close to finding it after funneling an absurd amount of Nazi money to search the grail during World War II. Yes, this is a true fact. No, no grail was ever found. Even Indiana Jones, whose story came out of these real-world events, never resurrected the miraculous cup. So, I pose the question: What if they are all wrong? What if The Holy Grail is not some chalice or well or any destination, but rather metaphor for our own internal quest for meaning? The quest that begins with the sublime question we begin asking at some point in our lives….Why am I here? ….and then spawns a miraculous journey on purpose. To begin, splash a bit of honesty on your face and mix it with the dots in your life. But don’t take it from me. Take a look at the journey of just a few of the incredible people I’ve had the honor to meet over the past couple of years:   On the other side of the pond in the UK, Bhavani Esapathi created The Invisible Health Data Project. The project amplifies the many voices that make up the invisible chronic illnesses thousands suffer with each and every day. There are so many illnesses that go unnoticed in the world today and Bhavani helps make sure these people get their voice out to receive the attention they deserve. NYC native Gabriela Pereira is the instigator and purveyor of purpose behind the DIY MFA. When the rest of the world obsesses over science and tech, Gabriela shows creative writers how they can turn their art into a profitable and philanthropic tool to elevate all of humanity. Physical therapist turned entrepreneur, when Ashley Jacob learned of her mother’s diagnosis, she took her pain and anguish and turned it into her quest to find answers. Her questions morphed into the beautiful long-form podcast, Tsuris, which features interviews from the many vantage points that make up a serious health prognosis. And lastly, after high school, a starry eyed teen named Tyson Adams went out to vagabond around the world. Little did he know that his travel would lead to a cathartic and philanthropic journey. His work now creates schools and wells in Laos for children in need through selling coffee and coconut oil to adults in need. _______________________________ The Holy Grail, I believe, is not a cup or chalice at all. Rather, it is one’s personal soul-shaping quest that goes beyond the self and transcends to benefit others. It’s truly a beautiful journey, a hero’s journey, that I invite you to me on. What about you? What is your “Holy Grail”?

I write this episode as the rain pelts the airport tarmac outside as I sit here ready to board my plane home from a weekend trip in Charlotte. Before I do that, I’d like to share a few thoughts on being authentic in our speech and living the art of truthfulness. Grab your cup of coffee and me. And oh yeah….quick note… be careful with flying with a hand coffee grinder. You should have seen the look on the TSA employee’s face when, after checking my bag, she pulls out the grinder with a quizzical look, opens it, and then smelled the delicious fresh coffee beans inside. I offered to make her a cup, but alas...she had work to do. But, I digress... -------------------- Have you ever found yourself biting your lip, holding back what you really wanted to say, but held back for one reason or another? Telling the truth and being honest in our communication can be as difficult as holding sand in our hands. Squeeze the hand too hard and it hurts. Too light and sand falls swiftly through the fingers. Like riding a rollercoaster, we’re often raised to keep the limbs of truth inside the ride of life at all times to keep safe from offending family, friends, coworkers, and acquaintances. What are a few examples of when I’ve held back from speaking what I’ve honestly thought? --- When a family member continues to eat foods that harm her even after being diagnosed with diabetes brought on from obesity and eating too much of these foods --- When a coworker talks badly about another at the proverbial water cooler --- When a loved one says a prejudicial slur at the holiday dinner table And these are just a few times at which I’ve bitten my lip. The practice of telling the truth is something that I continue to work on because so many ancient texts encourage us to speak the truth -- both to ourselves and to others -- throughout our lives. The yogic texts call this practice of truthfulness, Satya. As Patanjali put it, “To one established in truthfulness, actions and their results will be become subservient.” In the Abrahamic texts, Jesus of Nazareth said we should speak and live truthfully. In the Book of Ephesians, he is said to say, “each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all of one body.” Popular culture also teaches us this as well between the lines of a movie or book, even back to good ol’ Will Shakespeare. Polonius tells his son Laertes in the play Hamlet before he goes off to college: “Give thy thoughts no tongue, nor any unproportion’d thought his act.” Of course, for anyone who knows the play well, Polonius needs to listen to a bit of his own advice. So, how do we speak the truth, live honestly, and be authentic without being ostracized by those we love? (I have no desire to don a robe and live in a cave in the Himalayas and I think you’d prefer not to, as well. It’s a beautiful world we live in and I intend to be an active part of it.) And to tell you the truth, as a writer I know there’s tremendous value in bending the truth, at least when it comes to helping one to feel the truth. Why? Tim O’ Brien, author of the brilliant metaphysical war story The Things They Carried, perhaps puts it best: “That's what fiction is for. It's for getting at the truth when the truth isn't sufficient for the truth.”

On this episode, I’d like to thank the squirrels outside my window for reminding me of a little old gent who built a shanty and pissed off the government back in the 1800s. Yes, I’m talking about Henry David Thoreau who spent his days sitting in his little cabin in the woods on Walden Pond. And yes, that guy seriously loved squirrels. I precisely reading his book Walden ( which is a fantastic read by the way that you should check out) and for two whole pages the dude talks about squirrels scampering across the snow. Ridiculous? Perhaps. But you can also look at it from another point of view. Thoreau focused on the minutia and the beauty of the small things in front of us. And that my friends is what I’d like to talk about. Let’s talk about the 1 sign you’re creating work that matters... After attending Harvard in the 1800s, Thoreau did the exact opposite of what one was supposed to do. While other educated men followed the well-trodden path of medical school or law studies, Thoreau grabbed a hammer, some nails, a few blocks of wood, and went to write in the woods just 19 miles outside of Boston. Did his work save lives? Plenty. Did his work shape law? Big time.   All criticism aside, Thoreau went on to pen two key books that continue to inspire many today to practice the art of awareness, to look at the meandering veins on a fallen leaf, and to consider that our life’s work is to develop something that transcends the physical. Just as soon as his work began to inspire many, it was just as soon followed with criticism: the #1 helpful sign that you're walking your own path and creating work that matters. What do the critics say? Some call Thoreau a phony since he didn’t really live off the land and would often walk two miles to his parents’ home for a hot meal… he’d often frequent the local pub for a cold brew… and many say he wasn’t as hardcore as John Muir (the other famous nature-lover that inspired Teddy Roosevelt to create the U.S. National Park system... And the list goes on. So, here’s a serious question. Why do we  criticize people? Modern psychology would say that criticism is often reflected in one’s own frustration and insecurity to walk their own path. Makes sense since carving your own path is a heck of a lot harder than walking the well-trodden trail. Criticism can be a helpful sign, however. Contemporary business strategist, Dorie Clark, framed it like this when we sat down for a chat. She said, “criticism helps us know when we’re on to something worth working for.” Ah, there’s the rub. Criticism, however, can cut way deeper than a stick or stone or the thorns that cover the road less traveled by. Criticism sucks, plain and simple. It can even stop us dead in our tracks of creating work that matters. The thing is, when we conform to what others consider normal to avoid criticism, we stray away from what inspires us. We veer away from the greatest version of ourselves. Like Abraham Maslow said, we all have a unique genius to offer the world — art that the world needs, as Seth Godin often puts it — and committing to our inspiration will lead to being criticized. The only way to escape criticism is to do nothing and say nothing like the old saying goes. The truth is, the world needs your work: -- That memoir you’ve written, but haven’t pitched to an editor for fear of being criticized for being too real and too vulnerable, needs to be read by those who will relate to your story and will no longer feel alone. -- That newsletter you’ve been writing on your own, but haven’t shared with the world, needs to be read by the young yogis who want to build a bridge between body and spirit. -- That start-up you’ve been longing to build? Yes, the world needs that too. But, how do you start?   Footstep by footstep.  

You’re listening to Your Life on Purpose:  the podcast that helps  you feel less like a cog in a machine by connecting the dots between life, your ions, and what the world needs, all in under ten minutes.   Music I’m your host Mark Guay and welcome my friends to season 2 of Your Life on Purpose. On this episode, I’d like to share with you a story that happened in my life when I went to college. It wasn’t a major event back then, yet now I realize that this small dot in my life significantly altered my way of looking at living my life. Let me take you back: On one blistery fall night, the trees had shed their motley colored leaves and, as chilled air blew throughout the college campus, I walked the two miles back to my dorm room to go to sleep. Before that, however, I did what one shouldn’t do before bed: I checked my digital messages. And as I waited for the archaic clunky desktop computer to boot up Windows XP, I had no idea what would happen next. It was fall semester my sophomore year and I had died. The computer booted up, I checked my AOL Instant Messenger ( that?), and messages flooded my screen like some type of dystopian novel: “Please tell me NO!.” “Mark, you will be missed. I when… ” ‘Mark, please call me as soon as you can.” And on and on and on. I then signed on to this new app called Facebook and quickly learned the reason for all of these messages. An old high school friend who thought he’d play a prank had posted: “RIP Mark Guay”. What ensued next surprised my old friend like a monster under his childhood bed. The message began to get shared and shared and shared well before the world even had a “share” button or a timeline. Facebook, at that time, wasn’t even open to the public: only college ed students with a university email. The message took on the telephone effect where one person told another who told another who then embellished the story to tell another. When the telephone at my mother’s house rang, she woke up from a deep sleep to hear the news no parent ever wants to hear: her son was dead. Meanwhile, at the time my mother heard the news I, on the other hand, was enjoying the fall sky and the smell of pumpkin spice in the air as I enjoyed an evening walk. My legs worked perfectly, my heart pumped oxygen to my blood, and a smile crept on my face every time a gust of wind would blow a vortex of leaves in the air. What about a cell phone, you ask? The minimalist in me at the time left my archaic flip phone in the dorm. Text messaging was too expensive, so I didn’t have that either. As soon as I realized what had happened, I called my mother to tell her I was okay and proceeded to reply back to the many messages that filled my screen. Some perhaps thought my spirit had typed the messages, but alas it was just the peach-fuzz faced college me trying to let the world known I was alive and well. Reflecting back on this dot in my life, I realize now how lucky I am that this happened. I had the opportunity to experience something that many often wonder about: What would people say about my life if I died? Perhaps you’ve even thought of this before. A part of me wishes I had the foresight to save the kind messages people wrote, but without a camera or a screenshot feature, I didn’t even have that option. Perhaps one day, Facebook will bring them back to me. But for now, I continue to think of this question. Asking myself what would people say about me if I were to die tomorrow continues to push me to be a more loving, kind, and thoughtful change-maker of a man. It continues to fuel my desire to (teetering on the cliche here) be the change I want to see in the world. It continues to allow me to see my imperfections as tools to learn more through the human experience. When I first wrote the Empowered Life template that many continue to use to manifest their greatest self, this was the first question I had asked readers to think about. It’s a grave image, yes, (see what I did there?) but thinking of what people will say about you at your funeral allows you to reverse engineer and now build this vision into present reality. It pushes you to live in the now and be that which you want to be ed for. —- Try this one-minute exercise: Take in three full and complete breaths with a 4-6 count inhale and 4-6 count exhale. Gently close your eyes, smile, and lengthen through the spine to broaden through your chest. Continue to breathe with this power posture as you begin to imagine one person in your life you love. Imagine them speaking to you and saying the things they will always about you. Imagine them hugging you, filling you with their love, and thanking you for the many kind words and loving deeds you shared. —- In my life, I’ve found this simple visualization technique to push me to be a better person in my life. Am I perfect? Ha, absolutely not — that’s the beauty of living — but am I growing more and more into the person I love to be? Absolutely. Now, why does this visualization work? Social Psychologist Amy Cuddy taught us in her popular TED Talk that the simple act of putting our bodies into a power posture changes the hormonal structure in our body. Our body releases more happy hormones that boost our confidence and literally trick our body into feeling that which we wanted to feel. In other words, Cuddy took the old idiom “fake it till you make it” and gave it scientific backing. If you want to feel more confident, says Cuddy, putting yourself in a power posture and breathing complete steady breaths will literally get you to feel more confident. Pretty cool, right? Cuddy’s research furthers my belief that we are capable of far more than we often give ourselves credit for. Perhaps like how Einstein showed us the universe continues to expand and expand beyond the limits of our understanding, we too as individuals can continue to expand and expand and expand. Perhaps we truly can become anything we intend to be. Well, that’s my story for today. Thank you so much for ing me and I wish you a life full of love, light, and adventure. Want to say hello and share your thoughts?  Just head over to yourlop.com.. Now, without further ado, let’s dance.

(I originally shared this meditation on my Sunday newsletter and wanted to make sure you all had the chance to listen to it, as well. Click here to receive all YLOP updates and a dose of motivation every Sunday.) ** * Please do not drive, walk, nor ride a Segway while listening to this episode *** I'm moved by the concept of finding happiness in any situation. It doesn't mean you have to be thrilled by a particular situation you may be in whether that's suffering from a job loss, the loss of a loved one, or another personal struggle; but, it's finding happiness no matter the situation through focusing on what to be grateful for. ----- If you've never meditated before, to be patient with yourself and open. Meditation is not a religion (though it could help a person deepen their relationship to a religion if that is the intention). Meditation is simply a tool to help greater experience that which is around us and already inside. It's a practice that helps us experience the wholeness of our daily lives. It moves our experience from "Same S*** Different Day" to experiencing the tiny miracles that make up each day. It's so easy to get caught up in the minutia of the day-to-day, the muck, or get caught up in the many responsibilities that we all share. It takes conscious effort to see beyond it. That's the beauty of meditation. It helps us see the lotus flower that rises out of the daily muck. Gratitude Meditation This meditation combines the research of Abraham Maslow with the ancient practice of visualizing chakra centers. We will begin by slowing down the breath and then saying a series of affirmations that align with our energy chakra centers. (If uncomfortable with the thinking of chakras, consider instead imaging a bright light that fills your body with each breath. You pick the color.) Begin in a comfortable seated position, either on a chair or sitting on a meditation pillow with your arms gently resting on your knees, palms resting up to feel lifted or palms down to feel grounding. Find a space that is free from distractions, whether that's a bench in the park or a corner in your home office. Softly close your eyes or if you prefer them open, gaze gently down the tip of your nose to focus on a pebble or a spot on a wall that will not move. Begin your meditation by slowing down your breath to a smooth four-count: counting on an inhale up to four (1,2,3,4) then exhale counting back down (4,3,2,1). When ready, continue to breathe steady while saying aloud or to yourself the following affirmations. You may say them only once on one complete breath if you don't have much time or repeat the affirmation for 5-10 breaths. It's up to you. The audio I provide (by clicking the image above) has been made into a 10-minute meditation. #1: I have all the necessary elements to thrive in my life. If comfortable, you may imagine a bright red light at the center of the pelvis near the colon. #2: All the relationships I need to thrive in my life are with me now or well on their way. If comfortable, you may imagine an orange light glowing around the naval. #3: All that I need in my life to grow stronger and healthier is either with me now or well on its way. If comfortable, you may imagine a yellow light glowing at the solar plexus. #4: I am full of love for myself and others and forgive those who have harmed me in the past. If comfortable, imagine a glowing green light at the heart. #5: I speak honestly with confidence and am open to receiving help from others. If comfortable, you may imagine a bright blue light at the throat. #6: The current path I am on is helping me to write the life story I'm honored to read.If comfortable, you may imagine a bright indigo light glowing near the eyes. #7: I follow my inspiration and breathe away fear. If comfortable, imagine a bright violet light glowing above the crown of the head.Gently open your eyes or loosen your gaze and take a couple breaths before moving on to the next part of your day. Send a note of thanks to yourself for taking this time to practice gratitude. that meditation is merely planting a seed that grows slowly with every drip.

(I originally shared this meditation on my Sunday newsletter and wanted to make sure you all had the chance to listen to it, as well. Click here to receive all YLOP updates and a dose of motivation every Sunday.) ** * Please do not drive, walk, nor ride a Segway while listening to this episode *** I'm moved by the concept of finding happiness in any situation. It doesn't mean you have to be thrilled by a particular situation you may be in whether that's suffering from a job loss, the loss of a loved one, or another personal struggle; but, it's finding happiness no matter the situation through focusing on what to be grateful for. ----- If you've never meditated before, to be patient with yourself and open. Meditation is not a religion (though it could help a person deepen their relationship to a religion if that is the intention). Meditation is simply a tool to help greater experience that which is around us and already inside. It's a practice that helps us experience the wholeness of our daily lives. It moves our experience from "Same S*** Different Day" to experiencing the tiny miracles that make up each day. It's so easy to get caught up in the minutia of the day-to-day, the muck, or get caught up in the many responsibilities that we all share. It takes conscious effort to see beyond it. That's the beauty of meditation. It helps us see the lotus flower that rises out of the daily muck. Gratitude Meditation This meditation combines the research of Abraham Maslow with the ancient practice of visualizing chakra centers. We will begin by slowing down the breath and then saying a series of affirmations that align with our energy chakra centers. (If uncomfortable with the thinking of chakras, consider instead imaging a bright light that fills your body with each breath. You pick the color.) Begin in a comfortable seated position, either on a chair or sitting on a meditation pillow with your arms gently resting on your knees, palms resting up to feel lifted or palms down to feel grounding. Find a space that is free from distractions, whether that's a bench in the park or a corner in your home office. Softly close your eyes or if you prefer them open, gaze gently down the tip of your nose to focus on a pebble or a spot on a wall that will not move. Begin your meditation by slowing down your breath to a smooth four-count: counting on an inhale up to four (1,2,3,4) then exhale counting back down (4,3,2,1). When ready, continue to breathe steady while saying aloud or to yourself the following affirmations. You may say them only once on one complete breath if you don't have much time or repeat the affirmation for 5-10 breaths. It's up to you. The audio I provide (by clicking the image above) has been made into a 10-minute meditation. #1: I have all the necessary elements to thrive in my life. If comfortable, you may imagine a bright red light at the center of the pelvis near the colon. #2: All the relationships I need to thrive in my life are with me now or well on their way. If comfortable, you may imagine an orange light glowing around the naval. #3: All that I need in my life to grow stronger and healthier is either with me now or well on its way. If comfortable, you may imagine a yellow light glowing at the solar plexus. #4: I am full of love for myself and others and forgive those who have harmed me in the past. If comfortable, imagine a glowing green light at the heart. #5: I speak honestly with confidence and am open to receiving help from others. If comfortable, you may imagine a bright blue light at the throat. #6: The current path I am on is helping me to write the life story I'm honored to read.If comfortable, you may imagine a bright indigo light glowing near the eyes. #7: I follow my inspiration and breathe away fear. If comfortable, imagine a bright violet light glowing above the crown of the head.Gently open your eyes or loosen your gaze and take a couple breaths before moving on to the next part of your day. Send a note of thanks to yourself for taking this time to practice gratitude. that meditation is merely planting a seed that grows slowly with every drip.

All right change makers. I have little bit to share some news with you. When I first launched this podcast in May of 2015, I had no idea it would garner such attention and pull together some of the most ionate and happy people I’ve have ever met.In June when I started getting emails from people thanking me for starting this podcast, I knew I had to pick it up and turn it into a daily podcast.And I did just that. I didn’t know if I could do it, but trusted in myself that I’d find a way to make it happen.It’s been 50 episodes and nearly 50,000 have tuned in. Over 200 hundred people have reached out to me directly and shared their stories.From a brilliant yoga teacher in Canada to an almond farmer in California, I’ve somehow tapped into a network of truly incredible people who don’t want to just settle. We want to suck out the marrow in life as Thoreau would put it and live so as we’re not just existing, but we’re living. We’re learning. We’re growing.We’re walking down our heroic paths and following the beat of a heart trusting that the dots will connect in the future.It’s a beautiful way to live.—-My path has certainly changed since I started Your Life on Purpose. You’ve all given me such inspiration and because of you all I’ve pushed myself as a writer. Because of you all, my words and our message have been featured on The Huffington Post, Elephant Journal, Collective Evolution, and will soon be featured on Mind Body Green.Over 100,000 people have read my work this summer. And while I didn’t make a cent off of those words, let me tell you something.Having 10,000 people read an article of mine, having over 1000 people a day tune into Your Life on Purpose podcast, and receiving emails from people sharing their own heroic journeys has paid me more than any paycheck could ever cover.And I just got asked to do a writing workshop at a major yoga festival in Arizona, United States in the spring of 2016.And for that, I thank you for making these dreams come true and ing me.—I’ve reached a turning point in my heroic journey and need to venture down the path that’s calling me. It’s a path that blends my ion for teaching, for writing, while also doing the right thing and maintaining my responsibilities as a loving husband, ionate teacher, and global citizen.I’ve often said that time is our most valuable commodity. And I need to be wiser with how I spend my time.Which is why I need to press pause on the podcast for now and focus on my writing and teaching.—I have a group of students who are eagerly waiting for me to begin my writing and communications course and I have beautiful ideas of how to help them activate the hero within them to live remarkably.Being a good teacher takes a lot of time and effort, and I don’t want to be an ordinary teacher. My students deserve an extraordinary teacher.I have a wife who I love dearly who is suffering from Lyme Disease and needs my help. She deserves a loving husband.But I know I also have you all and you all deserve an extraordinary podcaster who creates motivating content.I don’t ever want to deliver mediocre content to you which is why I am pressing pause on the podcast.Pressing pause will allow me to focus on my writing, be a stellar teacher, and also be a loving and ive husband.It will also allow me to work when time is available on season 2 of Your Life on Purpose. I honestly don’t know what it will look like, but my intuition tells me I will create 10 ten minute episodes at a time and deliver them in seasons much like a television series.I hope this works for you and when season 2 does start, you welcome me back into your lives.—If you’re just tuning in to the show for the first time, please enjoy the last 49 episodes. I’ve shared with you tips to connect the dots between school, your ion, and what the world needs all in under ten minutes.I’ve shared with you advice I’ve received from some of the most brilliant minds I’ve interviewed including Seth Godin, Scott Harrison from Charity : Water, and the gender sociologist Jean Kilbourne among many others.I hope you go through the past episodes and don’t just listen to the tips I share, but rather live them out.We could spend our whole lives reading a book and never live one ourselves.—-So, as I sign off here and take a break to work on my writing, I invite you all to my weekly newsletter which I will most definitely continue. I send out on email every Sunday morning that includes tips and such that I learn from my own life along with the future interviews that I have planned over the next couple of months along with updates on Your Life on Purpose.I have extraordinary dreams for Your Life on Purpose. Imagine bringing us all together for heroic workshops and writing sessions all around the world and you can start to see what I’m talking about.I leave you all with the one tidbit of advice that Radhanath Swami said to me. He said, we can spend our lives focusing on the little fish — the little things that come up in life — but, it takes focus and patience to wait for the big fish and focus on the things that matter most in our lives. But to focus on the big fish, we have to let the little fish swim by.

This past weekend at Omega Institute, I had the privilege to listen to the words and sing with some of the happiest people I have ever met in my life.And I learned something that I’d like to share with you to start this episode. It’s simple and it’s only one question.When you strip away everything — all the fat — all the things that don’t matter — what is the narrative that you’re telling yourself? What is the story you’re telling yourself?I found myself at breakfast and ed in on a ionate conversation about writing and life. When it came to my turn and someone asked me “What do you do, Mark?” I hesitated like always because I hate getting asked that question. Which I’m not quite sure really why.I said what I always do: “I write and I teach writing.” If they ask for more, I tell them that I run an online platform called Your Life on Purpose.But here’s where I learned something interesting about myself.I asked Susan, the woman to my left, how we can find the narrative that we’re secretly telling ourselves. For instance, one woman had explained how she realized that she was telling herself that she’s worthy of abuse (which is why she was still in an abusive relationship); another woman said that she told herself that she’s not worthy of greatness.Interesting, right?So, of course, I wanted to know what narrative I’m telling myself. Because I didn’t really know.And then I learned that I was telling myself…I’m not a real writer.When the people at breakfast started asking me about what I write about, I started by saying that “I’ve written a few e-books, but haven’t been traditionally published yet.”I also said “I write for The Huffington Post, Elephant Journal, and other large media sites, but I don’t get paid to do it.”Susan helped me see that I’m talking myself out of being a writer. She said, I am a writer. I just need to tell myself that.Interesting, right?Throughout my life I’ve learned that I will always feel like I need another degree, another certification, or to make money from something to feel as if I am good enough to be a master. This is toxic thinking.Because I’ve learned that a master is not a teacher. A master is a student. And to master something means to constantly learn and work at becoming better at something.I mean….I’ve been teaching writing and communications for over ten years, am being asked to do writing workshops throughout the world, and have other writers ask me for tips to gain access to and write for large media sites.Over 10,000 people read my last piece.But I still found myself not calling myself a real writer when I introduced myself. That was the story I was telling myself.What’s the story that you are telling yourself? Strip away all the fat and dig deep and try to find it. Pay attention to how you introduce yourself and what you say about yourself when meeting others.

Last night, I took part in a kirtan ecstatic chant led by the Grammy-award nominee Krishna Das then camped under the stars.  For those who don’t know what kirtan is, my  beginner understanding is that it’s a call and response type of singing that aligns vocal sounds to our chakras. I don’t really know the ins and outs, but what I do know is that it makes me feel really good and keeps me on the positive. And that my friends is a good thing, right? Krishna Das and Radhanath Swami  talked a bit about the ripple effect and the collective consciousness. Like others have said before — including the Dalai Lama — the way we react to external stimuli (good and bad) directly influences those around us.  Some have even gone so far to say that our energy transmits a ripple throughout the ether, so that even people you don’t come in with are influenced by your energy. Interesting, right? All that aside, there’s tremendous power in projecting an optimistic and positive mindset when our dots don’t really line up the way we had planned. Dr. Wayne Dyer puts it nicely. He says, “Initiate a habit of choosing thoughts and ideas that feeling good and powerful, and that elevate you to a higher level of consciousness" So here are three thoughts to consider to help keep it on the positive and elevate your consciousness. 1. Meet Negativity w/ Love The other day, I witnessed an employee at a friend’s company grow red in the face when on the phone with her boss. When the call ended, she cursed and verbally expressed (at a decibel well beyond what’s necessary) how annoyed she was at her boss for not scheduling meetings more effectively. Her negativity was nearly impossible to ignore. Her negativity immediately changed the culture in the room and my shoulders grew tight. I walked out of the room because I just didn’t want to be around that kind of negativity. How rude to steal away other people’s happiness, I thought.  Then, I ed what Ram Dass talks about in Be Love Now. He says to embrace all things with love. In times like these, try to understand that perhaps this person has had a really tough day. Or perhaps they have suffered a lot of loss in their life that led them to be quite negative. Or perhaps they just don’t have a lot of loving positive people surrounding them in life. Point being... offerloving kindness in place of feeding negativity. 2. Frantic Energy Helps No One Dr. Deri Joy Ronis writes in Bridging the Gap to Peace: From a New Way of Thinking Into Action that “Frantic mental or nervous physical energy serves no purpose in helping us get beyond the very things that frustrate us.”  She adds that not being at peace isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but a signal that we need change and should pay attention to it. Trust me — I understand how it’s far easier to say this than practice it. I constantly struggle to recognize my pitta fire energy and douse it with water when I need to chill out. Sometimes, however, when “crap hits the fan” — so to speak — it’s a lot easier to scream, shout, and be frantic.  But it won’t really get me anywhere.  In yoga, it’s often taught to dig deep into emotions and experience them so that you can understand them better. So, the next time you feel a deep surge to getfrantic, dig into that emotion and really feel it. Indulge a bit. If you want to scream, really scream. Do what Angelina Jolie has said to work and scream in a pool so it doesn’t bother anyone. Just fully feel your sadness, anger, or jealousy and experience it without doing any harm to others.  The next time this emotion arises, it will be easier to recognize it and make a choice. You’ll be able to choose whether or not to go down that path. More often than not, it will get easier to say “no, thank you. I don’t need to go down that path.”  Another helpful trick here is a simple breathing exercise where you breathe in the mantra “I am a mountain” and breath out “I meet my vulnerability with love.”  3. Where’s Your Positive Fuel? Having a positive mindset doesn’t mean being ignorantly optimistic. It means making a choice to place your focus on the positive with the understanding that negativity does little to get you anywhere.  After college, a lot of us lose our optimistic fuel.  In college, most people are quite happy. Academia most definitely is a stressful environment, but, for the most part, days are filled with people who are activity pursuing their dream career and having lots of positive social interaction and meaningful discussions. After college, a lot of us enter into  what’s often called the daily grind. Perhaps you’re working a job that doesn’t fuel you because you have a responsibility to bring in income to provide for your family. That, I’d argue, would be the majority of the over-educated employees working at jobs far below their skill after the 2008 economic crisis.  Just like you’d fill up your car on your daily commute, think about where you’re filling your positive fuel tank. Actively seek out positive people at work, have a weekly in person or digital meet up with a positive mastermind group, or read material that focuses on the positive (i.e. not the newspaper).  We’re animals, let’s not forgot. We are an effect of our habitat. What makes us quite different from other animals, however, is that we have a choice to choose our habitat and those we invite to share it with us. We have a choice on where to focus our attention. At Omega Institute, Radhanath Swami used the analogy of a crane. He said, like a crane, we have the choice to go after big fish or go after the little fish. Big fish satisfy us far more than little fish, but if we just choose to go after the little fish, we can never focus on the big fish. If we choose to focus on the negative annoyances in life, we can so easily ignore what really matters. And that, Radhanath Swami states, is to try to live out the best version of ourselves through loving kindness.  —- What are your thoughts? Like always, I’d love to hear what you think. How do you keep it on the positive? Just hit reply and say hello. 

As I get my tent and sleeping ready for a kirtan festival I’m attending this weekend, I’d like to break down a few of the concepts I explored this week.   Here’s the weekly wrap up. If you just tuned in for the first time, make sure to check on the past four episodes to see the longer version of these concepts.   Or there are some people who don’t have 10 minutes in their day, so they only tune in on Fridays. That’s cool with me. So, for those crunched for time, here’s four purpose-filled boosts to live more intentionally and connect the dots.   Surfing and Mindfulness   There’s a lot we can all learn from surfers. The next time you’re near the ocean or have some time to Youtube, watch surfers. They’re often ridiculously happy.    This is what they know: - To be grateful for when a wave comes - To celebrate your friends when they ride their own wave and you have to sit on the sidelines and cheer them all. I know that when I was trying to make it into the New York City personal training circuit and landed a really good job at an elite facility in Chelsea, Manhattan, one of my fellow trainers literally said to me in of getting customers: “You eat what you kill. It’s a dog eat dog world, man.”    I for one completely disagree and don’t even want to play that game.   Let’s build each other up instead of knock each other down   - Your wave will come. And it will end. Know that this is living and be grateful that you are living instead of just existing.   Trust in Discovery   I know I need to get better at trusting in discovery. Trusting in God, the universe, or whatever form of higher power you believe in. Like Steve Jobs said, you can’t connect the dots looking forward and plan all you want, that doesn’t mean you can connect your future dots.    We all need to trust in walking forward.    My buddy Tyson Adams knew this when found himself in the middle of Laos. He build a coffee shop where there had never been one and in the middle of a third world community, he took the money made from the coffee shop to build schools.   Somehow Tyson discovered Coconut Oil and that led to his latest path. But don’t take my word for it. Let’s listen to the man himself.   enter tyson   Be Unconventional    Finding your purpose is not about looking outside you. It’s about looking deep within, far deeper than most people ever look. Looking deep inside of who you really are is one of the scariest things we can do.   But in doing so, we are more easily able to place our feet in the right direction. The unconventional ways I explored on episode 46 include The Gene Keys which helps us discover the hidden purpose in our DNA, Ayahuasca, Meditation, and Pursuing an outwardly quest that peeks inward.    Unplugging   I feel like such a hypocrite whenever I talk about unplugging. Because I’m terrible at it. Some days I still find myself checking social media first thing in the morning because it helps me wake up before 5AM when my alarm goes off. The bright light wakes me up. But I know it’s not healthy to look at social media in the morning. It’s actually a terrible way to wake up. When I met Arianna Huffington, she told the group I was with that she doesn’t allow any technology in the bedroom.   Well, I’m no Arianna Huffington (yet, at least), but I do hope to one day master this skill.   Pursuing Your Quest   Isn’t it ironic that pursuing an outwardly quest like hiking around the world gives us the deepest peek inside of ourselves.   Chris Guillebeau showed me how pursuing a quest — not finishing a quest — is where you live your life on purpose. In a quest you’re not only challenging yourself. You’re  learning every day. You’re growing every day. You’re failing every day. But you’re motivated as all heck to keep on going.   ---   All right, well that does it for this week’s wrap up. I hope you got a lot out of it. As for me, I’m super excited to unplug and sleep under the stars at Omega Institute where I’ll get to others in an ecstatic chant with Krishna Das, Ram Dass, and Jai Uttal. This is a new experience for me and I’m curious, thrilled, and a bit scared at what to expect.     For one thing, we sing from 8 pm till 5:30 in the morning. I have no idea how I am going to stay up, but excited to feel the power of kirtan: a spiritual call and response kind of singing that, like meditation, helps a person find the ecstatic beauty in the present. 

 5 Reasons to Unplug  The crimson Costa Rican sun dipped beneath cerulean blue Pacific as I peered out from the yoga studio atop Blue Spirit mindfulness center in Nosara, Costa Rica.  Perched high on a cliff, I flexed by quadricep and stood firm in Warrior Two in this yoga studio that looks like a bird’s next nestled atop a jungle canopy.  Howler monkeys screamed through the air and birds of paradise soared at my eye level -- majestic and graceful in their freedom.  Time seemed to stand still and it felt like an endless summer.  How I came to find myself at Blue Spirit on a yoga retreat is a story for another time, but there I was in a yoga retreat led by Amy Dannheim and Dawn Feinberg: two hardcore and loving yoginis from Miami.  I came to Blue Spirit, not to vacation, but rather to level up my life. The word “vacation” burns my vocal chords. It’s acid for my soul. I don’t believe in vacations. I don’t want to vacate my life. I want to enhance my life.  And unplugging for a week on this endless summer retreat did the trick. I unplugged (mostly...I’ll explain later), and here is what I learned.  5 Reasons to Unplug (at least for a week) Time Slows Down I had just sat down for breakfast after another morning surf session and had a moment where I didn’t know what day it was. After just three days of no tv, no internet, and no phone calls, time felt like it was stuck in molasses.  My days felt longer and each day felt like three: the morning, day, and night.  By the time I went to bed, I felt such a rush of joy as I counted all the things I was grateful for that day.  Writing (on paper), meditation, yoga practice, and meaningful conversations replaced TV and Internet. Never was I a ive observer of my day. I spent every minute intentionally and with awareness.  Time is our most valuable currency. It’s worth far more than money or possessions.  You (re) Connect to Nature It’s so easy to get caught up in the rat race. I need to buy this, I need to complete this task, I need to fulfill this level of responsibility, I need to see this movie, and so on.  Instead of watching my computer screen or the television, I watched the ants crawl up the tree trunk. An iguana who I affectionately named Eddie, meandered through the thick brush outside my nature studio. Hummingbirds hovered over flowers of paradise and drank their nectar. Eddie and I even had a moment. He hobbled over to a small trickle of water and took a slurp then looked at me. So I took a slurp from my water bottle. We nodded to each other and then he went on his merry way. As much as we don’t like to it it, we’re animals. We’re right there on the food chain, catalogued in the animal kingdom with animals like Eddie.  We may have opposable thumbs and the ability to phonetically create a sophisticated language, but at our roots and beyond our smartphones, we need food and water just like Eddie does. Because we shop at massive supermarkets and never pick our fruits and vegetables or slaughter our meat, it’s easy to forget this. We depend on nature to supply our needs just like Eddie does. You Learn to Think on Your Own In a world where a drive to pick up mom to go to a coffee shop takes you by billboards and mass media marketing, it’s nearly impossible to ignore the messaging we received and are inundated with on a regular basis.  Unplugging separates you, at least digitally, from being exposed to the many messages that like to tell us what to believe in, who to vote for, and what pill we should take to be thinner, happier, sexier, or have less pain.  Jean Kilbourne, creator of the documentary series Killing Us Softly which explores the effect of marketing messages on adolescent women, famously shared that she is often told by people that they are not affected by marketing. When Jean looks at them though, they are often wearing something like a Gap t-shirt.  You (re) Learn to Have Deep Conversations   We’re living a beautifully connected world that allows for anyone to connect from the four corners of the world. But as much as we are connected, we’re perhaps even more disconnected than ever before. It’s too easy to not invest in a deep and meaningful conversation. When a conversation gets awkward, it’s far easier to move on to a new tweet, Snapchat, Periscope, Facebook, or Instagram post.  160 characters is a lot less stressful than 30 minutes of eye .  Deep and meaningful conversations help us as humans connect to one another and learn more about the human experience. They go deeper than a Facebook timeline which only posts the happy moments in life. They dive into the soul.  And the human soul is quite a beautiful thing.  By Subtracting, You Add So Much More to Your Life By subtracting the things that don’t matter in your life, you add so much for to your life. But it’s tough to really tell what doesn’t matter in our lives when we’re in the midst of our daily, weekly, and yearly rituals.  There’s always something to do or someone to take care of that makes it difficult to really focus on what you need.  I’m no luddite as I love this beautifully connected world we live in, but just because an ad tells me I need the next new thing, that doesn’t mean that a new gadget will add anything of value to my life. With the time to really sit down and reflect on my own, I was able to answer this question that I now share with you: Are you living or just existing? To live is not to collect things or scroll through Twitter. To live is to engage in experiences and suck out of the marrow in life as Thoreau would have put it.  ---   But this is just my opinion and I’d love to hear yours. You can reach out to me at [email protected] or leave a comment below. 

  5 Unconventional Ways to Find Your Purpose   Joseph Campbell reminds us that if we follow our own bliss, doors will open that will lead us down our path on purpose. He said, “When you follow your bliss... doors will open where you would not have thought there would be doors; and where there wouldn't be a door for anyone else.”   But you can’t find your purpose. It’s not out there. Your purpose has been with you all along. It’s deep inside you.   To help you unlock the potential inside of you, here are five unconventional ways to find your purpose. They stem from ancient wisdom and modern science and they all have one thing in common. It’s not so much what’s outside of you, but how to unlock what’s already inside of you. Past-Life Regressions   After graduating from Yale, Dr. Brian Weiss began his psychotherapy practice. However, through using hypnosis to help his patients unlock repressed memories, he found that his patients began speaking about realities that were very different from the present one they lived in.   Under hypnosis, patients would speak about being a different gender or race along with the odd ability to speak languages the present-day patient did not know. They even spoke in detail about past-life trauma which Dr. Weiss argues has helped many patients overcome present-life trauma.   While all of this can quickly be brushed off as non-scientific nonsense, modern-day connections with the Internet allow patients who practice past-life regressions to actually research and look up the visions they have while under hypnosis.   The language that one would speak under hypnosis would actually be an ancient language. Buildings and structures that a patient may envision would actually exist in present time. Some patients have even ed present-day family and shared intimate family secrets after experiencing a past-life as their ancestor.   Dr. Weiss explains that experiencing past-life regressions allow a person to understand the lessons they learned in their past lives. And through these lessons, a person can deepen their understanding of what they are meant to learn right here, right now, in the present life.   2. Meditation   Yes. Meditation. It’s not just for grounding and calming. It’s for centering and understanding who you are as a being. It’s for digging deep into your inner pysche. A daily meditation practice helps one recognize their thought patterns. They learn to identify what is serving them, what is clearly not and how to live more in the present. After establishing a steady practice, practitioners take the lessons learned in meditation into their daily lives. Side effects include having less water-cooler conversations and more meaningful dialogue along with living your life on purpose. The conversations you choose to have and the actions you choose to take will be more intentional.     As Pema Chodron reminds us, “Meditation is a work in progress, a process of uncovering our natural openness, uncovering our natural intelligence and warmth.”   3. Ayahuasca Deep in the heart of the Amazon lies a spirit vine that has caught the attention of medical researchers, shamans, and spiritual seekers for centuries. Known affectionately as plant medicine, Ayahuasca has been known to take participants on a deep introspective experience.   Through this psychedelic discovery, many have claimed Ayahuasca to be exponentially more effective than traditional psychotherapy. Michael Sanders, author of Ayahuasca: An Executive's Enlightenment says that many Westerners have called Ayahuasca “30 years of psychotherapy in a cup.”   Here's a bit of what Michael had to say when we sat down to chat about his book:   One seed of advice. Be very careful and research where you choose to have an Ayahusaca experience, says Jeffrey Slayter, founder of The Grand Initiative which takes high-level influencers on an Ayahuasca experience to deepen their understanding of the self, unleash dormant creativity, and further connect one to the planet.   Here is a list of resources to find a safe facility for Ayahuasca, says Jeffrey Slayter.   4. Gene Keys   Richard Rudd, author of Gene Keys, dives deep into ancient wisdom to help people discover the hidden purpose that lies in our DNA.   Rudd explains that The Gene Keys help to “shed light on your deepest potential by helping you to embrace your shadows and recognize your gifts.” You learn your strengths, your weaknesses, and learn how to effectively harness your ability to live extraordinarily.   Through this heightened level of awareness, a person can confidently walk down their independent path. So often we just need to get out of our own way and Rudd provides one avenue to unleash our creative potential..   5. Pursuing a Quest   Chris Guillebeau explains that a quest is not so much an external discovery, but rather an internal heroic journey.   In his book, The Happiness of Pursuit: Finding the Quest That Will Bring Purpose to Your Life, Guillebeau shares the stories of people he has met on his personal quest of traveling to every country in the world. All the stories entail the journey one takes on their personal quest: the hardships, the breakthroughs, and the lessons one learns when they embark on their heroic journey. Many questers start out seeking an external answer, but what many find out, however, is that their quest for their holy grail (so to speak) has taught them more about themselves than anything else. Through a quest, you face your deepest fears and realize that you are capable of far more than you can imagine.   --   The truth is, now that you can learn anything, you can be anything you want to. It’s a beautiful time to be alive and a perfect time for you to walk your own heroic path.   Of course, there are more ways one could deepen their purpose, and in case these unconventional ways don’t fancy your interest, try this one:   Complete this sentence as many times as you can.   My purpose is ________.   Write as many sentences as possible and tweak the words. When you cry or feel a deep surge of fear that says “You can’t do that!”....that’s when you found your current purpose. Like always, I’d love to hear your thoughts. Please leave them as a comment below or reach out to me on email at mark@y ourlop.com.

Sometimes there are moments in our lives that force us to redefine ourselves. A concrete wall can -- at times -- pop up just as we are joyfully walking down our heroic journeys. And man....can this be frustrating or what? Today I’m thinking about Redefining You and would like to share three tips to help you define yourself.  Today’s mantra: “Trust in discovery. Be open to where your feet will land next."  Whenever a concrete wall pops up in our lives, look carefully at the wall. If you look close, there's often a little arrow sketched into the wall pointing us in another (and often times more beautiful) direction.  Or a beautiful new person meets you at the wall and takes you down a new path for a short time. Or sometimes you can pull out your waist belt grappling hook and haul yourself over that wall if it’s not too high (childhood Batman fantasy anyone?). But when you can’t climb that wall, here are three tips to become aware of your new direction. 1. Stop Carrying So Much Tim O’Brien has a beautiful book called The Things They Carried. It’s a brilliant look into what the soldiers in the Vietnam War carried with them both physically, emotionally, and mentally.  Many of the story’s characters struggled to move forward in their lives until they learned to stop carrying so much.  The art of letting go is not easy. I stink at it.  As much as I pride myself on being a minimalist, I struggle to let go of things. I have gadgets, clothes, and other material things that I don’t need, but can’t for some reason donate to charity or recycle. I have childhood memories that still challenge my daily positive outlook in life. It’s so hard to let go of these things, but by doing so they allow us to move forward in life.  I recently met a yogini who after a terrible breakup of a long-term relationship, moved from California to Costa Rica and unplugged herself from the digital world ten years ago: no tv, no internet. She told me how much she added to her life when she subtracted the things that didn’t matter.  Open   I’m in the midst of redefining myself right now and honestly don’t have a clear plan of where this all will lead to. But I know that I need to keep exploring. Almost all of the extraordinary people I’ve interviewed in my work have had this type of open mind when they choose to stride down their own heroic path.  Joseph Campbell reminds us of following our bliss on our own individual paths: “When you follow your bliss... doors will open where you would not have thought there would be doors; and where there wouldn't be a door for anyone else.” So I’m trusting in this openness.  Ten years ago I entered into the teaching profession because I wanted to transform education and redesign the high school learning experience. I struck a concrete wall and am burnt out on trying to transform education. So I moved on and shifted instead of continuing to walk into a concrete wall. Because, well, continuing to walk into a concrete wall hurts.  Five years ago I was on track for Team USA (and perhaps Olympic qualifying) in triathlon. Injuries and the unnecessary stress it put on ability to be a loving family member and husband forced me to redefine myself.  Concrete wall. Four years ago, my wife and I started our harrowing journey into persevering through chronic Lyme Disease that took my wife from running marathons to a wheelchair in just a few months.  Concrete wall.  My wife had to quit teaching because her body wouldn't allow her to do so. She redefined herself by writing her first YA fantasy novel and launching a boutique gemstone jewelry line that uses the healing properties of gemstones. (yes, I know...I'm a lucky guy ;) Three years ago, I launched my writing career and started interviewing some of the greatest minds of our time.  Since launching Your Life on Purpose two months ago, I’ve had over one hundred people reach out to via email to share their love and appreciation. Over 50,000 people have tuned in.  And when I took The Purpose Manifesto message to my writing, my writing career has sky-rocketed. Over 10,000 people have read my recent articles on Elephant Journal.  Anne Lamott said, “Don’t look at your feet to see if you’re doing it right. Just dance.” And so, I’m putting on my dancing shoes.  You with me? Words...Words...Words   We’re a social species. On my LinkedIn profile, I use to have “Storytelling Animal” as my job title. In other words, I was calling myself “human.” But, I think only a few people got the joke.  After landing an interview at Apple headquarters in 2014, Apple flew me to Cupertino to sit down with the executive team.  One of the many incredible executives there told me that he didn’t quite get “Storytelling Animal”. It sort of made me come off as an arrogant marketing guy who is such an animal at spreading a message. Whoops. We are a storytelling species. If you were to tap into your primal roots, you’d the days of sitting around the fire and sharing stories.  But that doesn’t mean we’re good at communicating effectively.  Sometimes our message can get so easily constipated and misinterpreted. Like the caveman, I sometimes grunt when I need to learn to use the correct words.  That’s why I love languages. If I had one superpower in the world, it would be to be able to speak every language in the world (or universe). Discovering new words and developing deeper semantics allow us to create new realms of understanding and create new language, especially because our realities are constructed (says the Sapir-Whorf Hypothesis) by the words we use to construct our reality.  New words -- new language --  can help us see the arrow that's scribbled on the concrete wall. It can even bridge new relationships and connect you to your tribe of people that will help you live extraordinary.   I’d love to hear from you and learn from your thoughts. 

Today I’d like to talk about surfing and what it can teach us about living our lives on purpose.   I had not surfed in ten years and eagerly looked forward to getting up at 4:30 in the morning to surf dawn patrol in Costa Rica.   Little did I know that I’d see all the lessons I’ve been learning in meditation unfold before me in the white foam of heavy surf.   As I float out there in the Pacific Ocean and watched the Costa Rican sunrise, I started to think about what we can learn from surfing and how it could influence our happiness and productivity regardless of whether or not you catch a wave.   So, today I’d like to break down six tips we can learn from surfers   1. Paddle Hard    One of the hardest things when surfing, especially if it’s a beach break and not a point break, is busting through the white foamy surf. It looks easy but duck diving under an incoming wave or turtle rolling a long board takes some serious practice.    You have to learn technique and have to keep going.   So many people never make it beyond the break and get stuck in the tremulchious white water.    Keep pushing. There is calm water beyond the struggle. There is always a blue sky above the cloudy rain.   2. Practicing Gratuity    So many people think that surfing is all about catch the wave. It’s not. It’s about gratitude and practicing a grateful mindset. Floating out there in the blue water is absolutely stunning. Watching a sunrise or sunset is always memorable and meaningfulness regardless of how many you see.    Surfers know to be grateful for the beautiful nature and know to be grateful when there is surf.    3. Patience   Before I learned to surf, I always thought surfers caught waves all day. But the truth is, most surfers spend 80% of their time just floating there, waiting for a wave to come.    You don’t have any control of whether or not a wave is going to come your way.   Yes, you could look at as much data as you want and analyze when the next swell will come, just like you could always analyze the data of you web traffic or create a business plan, but that doesn’t mean a wave is going to come your way and conditions will be great.   You have to wait. You have to stay calm. You have to stay aware.    But when that wave comes, you have to fight like hell to catch it.   4. Now is the only present   Surfers know that when a wave comes, it’s do or die. You fight like hell to catch the wave. You can’t dwell on the past. You can’t say there will be one next time. The time is now and you must catch that wave.    Fight to catch it.   5. Your wave will come. Cheer on your friends.    As a surfer, I love watching other people catch a wave. They may only be 50 feet from me and  I know that if I were 50 feet to the left, I would have caught that wave, but I’m so happy to watch my fellow surfers carve a beautiful wave.   Your wave will come and your friends will cheer you one. Instead of getting upset when people ride that wave you want to ride, choose to celebrate them. We all grow a lot stronger and live a bit higher when we build each other up instead of compete to stand up and push everyone down.    6. The Wave Will End   You know that feeling. We’ve all been there. It’s where you are at the top of your game. Feeling like the king of the world. It’s where you land that job. You get that promotion. He or she says yes to your proposal.    But you also know that other feeling. The other side. When you come down from that high.    It’s great to enjoy the happiness of a win, but not so much fun to stay in the doldrom of defeat. Instead of getting caught up in emotions, recognize when an emotion arises and intentionally choose to either accept it or let it . Regardless, know that the teeter totter will come back. Your wave will end.   That’s only natural.   And when your wave ends, you may be back at square one — having to fight through the incredible white water surf of struggle.    The wave will end and you will fight again to get back out there. And another wave will come.    Enjoy it while it lasts. Indulge in it. Tell stories forever about the waves you rode. But know that just because a wave ends doesn’t mean there isn’t another one waiting out there for you.      So, what story could you share? When have you rode a wave? Pretend we are at a campfire and you just have to tell me this story. I’d love to hear it.

Okay — a lot of awesomeness this week. But I’ll tell you, it’s really hard coming back juggling work and responsibilities after spending an entire week at a mindfulness center focusing on building long-term mindfulness practices.    I don’t like vacations because I don’t have a life I want to vacate from. I have a life I want to enhance, so throughout the year I invest in myself to learn about something new, whether that’s a new skill or a deep practice.   Spending a week focusing on mindfulness helps me practice mindfulness in my daily life. That doesn’t mean it’s easy, but what it does is it gives me a reflecting diving board. It forces me to readjust and think anew about what’s important and reprioritize my life.   It forces me to really think about how I’m spending my time. It always gets me to really think about what words am I choosing to say and what actions I choose to act upon.    So, this week reflects a few of the thoughts that have been on my mind since coming back from Blue Spirit in Costa Rica.    1. Wasting Time   It’s incredible to me how time works. Some moments in our lives are as quick as a gust of air and other moments can freeze in place for a lifetime.    Joseph Campbell reminds us that we must give up the life we have planned in order to experience the life that is waiting for us.   So, as I look at my life plan and see my dream board that’s posted on my office wall, I need to realize that those destinations are not nearly as important as the journey I’m on right now.   And if they don’t come true, that’s okay. Because something far greater could come true, something beyond what we could even imagine right now.   2. Mindful Writing   I’ve identified three writing prompts that could help one be more mindful.  It helps a person discover their surrounding and often sparks beautiful creativity.   1. The Beat Word Sketch   Call upon your inner Miles Davis and write with a jazz beat that quickly takes in your surrounding and describes your sensory experience.    2. Focus Freewrite    - Choose a prompting question and then run with it, then train the brain to recognize when the mind has wandered of it’s focus.   3. Straight up journaling that may just be what Anne Lamott calls your shitty first draft. It’s just catharsis splattered with ink. Kind of like if Oprah and Jackson Pollock were to have made a painting.   3. Your Unfair Advantage   My buddy Scott does a great job of breaking down the six traits to find your unfair advantage.     Experience Skill Tallent Knowledge Character Connections   Finding your unfair advantage is not so much about taking advantage of people, but rather the unique gift that you can offer which no one else in the world can.   It’s your art and it’s freaking beautiful. Let it shine.   4, Finding Genius    We’re all geniuses in some way, but not everyone finds it.   To find it, you need to look beyond what the classroom and school typically asked of you. Genius isn’t about memorizing data or performing a task faster than everyone else. It’s not found in a test.     Genius, on the other hand, can be broken down into two separate tracks Genius 1 is better, stronger, or faster than anyone else and Genius 2 thinks so differently that society can’t do anything else but turn their heads in awe.

I just came back in from kayaking on the Hudson River and would like to share with you a few of my thoughts while out there. Like I often do, I thought about Einstein. He once said,   “If you ask a fish to climb a tree, he’ll spend his whole life believing he’s an idiot.” Einstein is spot on, but unless someone reads this quote or hears it from someone else, he more than likely will never know he’s a genius. We’re all geniuses in some way, but not everyone finds it. To find it, you need to look beyond what the classroom and school typically asked of you. Genius isn’t about memorizing data or performing a task faster than everyone else. It’s not found in a test. Genius, on the other hand, can be broken down into two separate tracks. There are geniuses like Daniel Tammet, the autistic savant who can master a language in just weeks, and then there are geniuses like Steve Jobs and Steve Woznisk who think conceptually and are so creative that they turn the box society stays confined in into a soccer ball for a game. Genius 1 is better, stronger, or faster than anyone else and Genius 2 thinks so differently that society can’t do anything else but turn their heads in awe.   I learned two key lessons about finding your genius: Lesson #1: Never Settle and Level Up with Community   Mario Armstrong, the head tech guru you see on The Today Show shared with me his latest work in motivating people to find their genius. He calls his group, the #NeverSettleClub and he’s touring the nation motivating millennials to break out of the shell they are living in and live their life to the fullest.   After being a part of major broadcasting companies for years, including The Today Show, Mario shared with me that one key difference between the most successful people and those who settle with less is willpower and community. The most successful people have incredible willpower, but they also have a community that s and nurtures them to do more, be more, and live remarkably.   (That's why I'd be honored for you to our community of change makers at yourlop.com.   Lesson #2: Get Ninja Focused and Grow Some Grit   To find your genius  you need to dig deep and be more micro niche than ever before. You see this problem with so many children. It’s so easy to start something, but hard to follow through and continue.   Kids pick up a new instrument or play a new sport when the going gets tough. Instead of pushing through to mastery, it’s way easier to just move on to something else.   Now let me be clear — this is a major struggle of mine. I like being a jack of all trades, but know that I need to push through to focus and achieve mastery.   That’s why I keep writing. Writing is never easy for me, though I always feel great after writing an article. I’m not a master at writing, but I’ve learned the value of pushing through and learning the intricacies of how to construct prose.   It’s help lead me to write for large media sites like The Huffington Post and Elephant Journal and you could do the same.   I’m not the best writer out there, but I’m consistent. And I deliver.   I push through.    The same goes for training your body for performance or just to get in really good shape. It’s not too hard to get in mediocre mental and physical health. But it requires focus, a dedicated meditation practice, and efficient physical efforts to achieve ninja-like health and awareness.     So, What’s so beautiful about your unique story and so deeply embedded in your ion that no one else could even fathom focusing on for a long stretch?

We all have an unfair advantage — it’s your unique genius. It’s that thing that you have that no one else has.   It’s a combination of what you have done in your life and what has happened to you in your life.   It’s a blended smoothie of nature and nurture. What you were born with when you came into this world mixed with how the environment you grew up in and the environment you now live in influences you.   Michael Phelps was born with paddles for feet and orangutang arms. He then put in a hardcore amount of effort to master the technique of swimming. This balance of nature and nurture amplified Phelps’ ability to dominate at the Summer Olympic games.   The same goes for Lance Armstrong. All steroid talk aside, when Lance was diagnosed with cancer, his body was destroyed. After intense bouts of chemo Lance could barely cycle down the street or walk to the mailbox. His body shriveled and any muscles that he had worked hard to develop were now gone from the intensity of cancer. He had years of practice to develop the skill to be a strong cyclist, but now he didn’t have the body.   So, he rebuilt his body into the perfect cyclist’s body with massive tree trunk for muscle legs and this helped him landed several Tour De victories. And yes, I’m aware that it’s easy to brush off his wins and dismiss them because of steroid use, but I think that’s a cop out. Sure, he may not have won all those races, but he still would have been incredible.   Bill Gates had an unfair advantage when he had access to a computer as a teenager when only very wealthy people or universities could house the computer which at that time was the size of an entire room.   And the list goes on.    Finding your unfair advantage comes from being aware and noticing. What did you come into this world with and what have you developed?   Who have you met?   What have you learned?   What can you master?    If Michael Phelps chose to never swim and pick up a computer instead, I’d doubt we’d here of him and his impact in the world would be far less than it is now.   The same for Bill Gates. If he took up swimming instead of nuzzling his mind into the intricacies of a computer, I’d doubt we’d see him at the Olympics.   My good friend Scott Oldford broke down six traits that make up your unfair advantage.   Scott is a serial entrepreneur in Canada who launched his first business as a teenager. He now runs Infinitus which is a successful international marketing company.    Experience Skill Tallent Knowledge Character Connections   Let’s break that down. What I’m going to do is ask you a question for each trait and I’d like for you to think about. I’ll pause a moment between each question in case you’d like to stop this recording and actually write them down.   1. What experiences have defined you? I call them dots. These are moments in your life that have shifted your life’s path.   2. What skills have you learned?   3. What are you actually good at? We could all learn skills, but what are you actually talented at? What have you mastered or have the potential to master?   4. What can you teach to others because you have enough knowledge to do so?   5. Are you being authentic and have you grown to love yourself? If you do where a mask, when do you find yourself able to take it off? This is where you should focus your time and attention.   6. Who do you know? The world is made up of beautiful people doing amazing things. And we’re all working together. We grow by building people up and helping. When you grow your network based on being authentic, you’re allowing people to help you and will often be able to return the favor. It’s a lost nicer climbing a mountain and sharing the view then being up at top alone.    To dive a bit further, here’s a bit of what Scott had to say when we sat down for a chat:   Enter Scott   So, what's your unfair advantage? I’d love to hear it.   Your unfair advantage is not a bad thing. The word advantage had a connotation to it like the word hustling does. It conveys that you’re winning and someone else is losing.   it’s a hierarchical way of looking at things.   But what if instead of looking at your unfair advantage as a way to take advantage of someone, you look at it as a way to enhance someone’s life. Because if you recognize that you have a gift and you don’t use it and you don’t share it, then that’s the biggest waste of all.     We all have a unique gift to give to this world and it’s our duty to share it.

Sometimes writers find themselves like I was this morning: staring at a blank screen listening to dubstep hoping magically that words will fill the screen. (And that's when my cat Yoda walked across the keyboard and words did actually fill the screen. They just didn't make any sense.) Here are three writing prompts to help you find your creative juice or kick you out of writer's block thanks to some good old friends like Jack Kerouac. You can also use these writing techniques to identify your ion and purpose because all of these writing strategies are meta-cognitive in nature, which is a big fancy word that means you call attention to your thoughts and think about your own thinking. 1.)? The Beat Word Sketch This is something my wife and I do often when we go on a date. It's fun. You should try it. The idea comes from Jack Kerouac, one of the most famous Beat Generation writers, who loved exploring the world around him through the art of language.  Kerouac believed that grammar and punctuation constipates our use of language and so by forgetting all of these rules, writers can write words more freely -- much like a musician would create a riff off a jazz beat.  So, here's what to do:Stop and look around and grab a pen and paper or use Evernote. Set a timer for 5 to 10 minutes. Then, write down what you see and think for the next 5 to 10 minutes. You are not allowed to use any grammar or punctuation, except a dash to separate your thoughts. Allow yourself to think silly thoughts and jump around like a firecracker or just write exactly what you see. It's a game between your left-brain and right-brain that gets you to breakdance with your words. Afterwards, you should have unlocked the potential to continue writing whatever it is that you were trying to get at before writer's block came about. Or... you'll just have a really cool bit of language to share at your next slam poetry event. Here's what it could look like: The lamp shade to my right looks like something straight out of the game clue and my Macbook shines bright in my face illuminating the intensity in my eyes as cafe guests mill around drinking beer coffee and chatting with their friends in spanish -- maybe a Spanish lesson? -- I when I first learned Spanish and tried to order a sandwich in Barcelona only to be laughed at by a teenager for my terrible American accent -- learning a language is something I love to do and haven't focused enough on -- learn French or Spanish next? I don't know -- Language is such a beautiful thing like a tango on the tongue between two souls that wish to connect. See? It's pretty weird and takes a bit of getting used to, but once you let go, it flows naturally and something you'll be surprised by what you create. I'm proud of the one line at the end. The rest of the paragraph is kind of junk, but that last line, "like a tango on the tongue" sounds beautiful to me and reminds me of the beautiful sing song of language.  2.) Journaling... ( That?)Yes, journaling -- the manly word for writing in a diary. I would be a major hypocrite if I said I journal consistently. The truth is, I have a long inconsistent string of journaling. When I was a kid, I had these dream journals where I would write down my dreams as soon as I woke up. And even as an adult, I can't stand handwriting, nor have I been able to type a consistent journal.  Michael Hyatt struggles with this too and writes about the need to journal. Here's a helpful template he created. The thing about journaling is that if you write in a journal every day, it will turn into a habit that will develop your reflective ability to be more aware and present, all while being able to make sense of your emotions. Consistent reflecting like this and trying to make sense out of the tangled yarn of life experiences will allow you to grow into a more present being. In other words, you'll be in control of your emotions and perhaps empathize with your readers more so than others.  Go ahead and try it. Try to keep a consistent journal. Real men would. Start small with maybe just a few sentences every day and then grow it into what you want. Says Jeff Goins, "If you want to get this writing thing down, you need to start writing every day. No questions asked, no exceptions made." 3.) Focus Freewrites These are a bit different than journaling and Beat Word Sketches. Journaling is entirely reflective and builds your meta-cognition. Word Sketches break free from grammar restrictions and ask you to describe the physical present (through descriptive language) all while allowing you to roam into your steam of consciousness.  Focus freewrites, however, are... a bit more focused. You'll need to choose a topic to start off with and will need a prompting question.  Here's what to do:? Step 1: Choose a prompting question. The question should somehow relate to the topic you are writing. Here are a couple examples: Why is the topic I want to write about important? How did I learn about this topic? Or they could be more existential in nature: What events have most shaped my purpose or the purpose of my reader? Should I grind the coffee beans at the store or right before I make a cup of coffee?   Step 2: Set a timer for 10 minutes (feel free to have the Star Wars theme song be the timer ring tone!) Step 3: Start off by answering the question and then let your mind wander a bit. Once it wanders too far away from the essence of the question, pull yourself back in and redirect and refocus your writing to the origin of the question. So that means you can answer the question a different way, or tell a new story that highlights your answer, or write how someone of another view point would answer the question.  The goal here is to become aware when you stray off your focused path and train your brain to come back to the focus of your writing. It's very much like meditation. When in seated meditation for instance, a common practice would focus on the breathing (in/out) and not think of anything else except, like Tom Hilgardner says, "be one with the breath." What happens, however, is the mind likes to think of... well... pretty much anything to distract you.  The mind will say things like "That itch in your right butt cheek is really annoying, isn't it? You should probably scratch that" or it will say "You should really prepare for that meeting today because it's going to be a tough one."  The practice then shifts to acknowledging that the mind has wandered and simply bring it back to the breath. Because the mind wanders so easily, many meditation practitioners will put words to the breath to help stay focused. During yogic meditation, David Life had us think the traditional mantra "Let' and "Go." So, you may think the word "Let" on the inhale and think "Go" on the exhale. Just like the focus freewrite, the practice of meditation is about coming back to focus on the present. So, with the focus freewrite it's about saying "Whoops, I've been a bit too tangential here" and then coming back to the main topic.    I hope these micro-roasted writing tips have helped you with your writing. Of course, these are only three tips when there are hundreds more to learn. But, then again, it's all about small beginnings right? Drip by drip.

Today I’d like to focus on time. When we live knowing that our future is uncertain, it allows us to experience the present of the now.   You see, I’ve learned that I need to develop a better relationship with time.    I’ve spent the past week at Blue Spirit -- a meditation and yogic lifestyle center nuzzled in the jungle of Costa Rica. It was only 6 days, but felt much much longer. And the reason for that is because we spent precious minutes focusing on the present, not dwelling on the future.   With the help of a group of mindful yogis and yoginis to help keep me able, I spent my time intentionally, knowing exactly what I was doing for every minute of the day. There was very little zoning out or busy work. No television. No water cooler chit chat. Just focused attention and meaningful conversation.    It’s incredible to me how time works. Some moments in our lives are as quick as a gust of air and other moments can freeze in place for a lifetime.    For example, I think we’ve all had that class where the clock moved as slow as molasses no matter how hard we stared at the click to try and use the force to make it move faster.    Then again, we’ve all had those moments where time stood still. Like my wedding day when my knees buckled as my wife came walking down the aisle toward me. Or, as my friends with children have told me, like the first second you hold your newborn baby.    Or perhaps that moment when you were handed that degree you worked so hard to obtain.   So often in my past I would stress about wasting time because I felt I only had so much time in this life and so much that I want to do. But, what if instead of worrying about wasting time, I focused on appreciating the time I have in the present? Because I don’t really know what will happen in the next moment.   Joseph Campbell reminds us that we must give up the life we have planned in order to experience the life that is waiting for us.     So, as I look at my life plan and see my dream board that’s posted on my office wall, I need to realize that those destinations are not nearly as important as the journey I’m on right now.   And if they don’t come true, that’s okay. Because something far greater could come true, something beyond what I could even imagine right now.   And in all honestly, this is really causing me to reflect on the life plan template I wrote which I give away free to all of you listening out there at your lop.com.    I will be revising it to add in this necessary lens.   I still think creating a life plan is really important because it allows you to choose the path you want to walk on, but we can’t just get so caught up in the destination.    A couple of weeks ago, I had the honor to sit down with one man who has the most beautiful outlook on time: JJ Hanson.   As the real man of steel, JJ’s story is one I will never forget.    After serving as a U.S. Marine, JJ enjoyed his role as a Project Director and Operations Manager for an investment company. He and his wife had just started raising a family when JJ suffered a grand mal seizure during a meeting at work.   Doctors diagnosed him with GBM and he was given a terminal diagnosis. He would soon die.   So time was of the essence.    As of today, he recently pushed the NYS Dept of Health to officially declare May 27th New York State Gray Day where people wear the color gray to help promote brain cancer awareness and he now serves on the executive team at Voices Against Brain Cancer.    JJ is still with us and looking stronger than ever, living far beyond his prescribed deadline.    Here’s a bit of what JJ had to share about time:    Enter JJ   So, what about you? If time is our most valuable currency, how do you spend it? At least that’s the question I’m going to be thinking about today, tomorrow, and hopefully for quite some time.   The difference now though is that I won’t worry about wasting time (or at least I’ll try not to), but rather appreciating the time I have now and recognizing it more fully.