In this week's monologue, Ed Zitron walks you through the wretched vibes surrounding CoreWeave's IPO and OpenAI's new funding, and the brittle state of the finances holding everything together. Semafor: Microsoft chose not to exercise $12 billion Coreweave option https://www.semafor.com/article/03/20/2025/microsoft-chose-not-to-exercise-12-billion-coreweave-option The Information: CoreWeave Faces Reality Check on Bullish Growth Forecasts https://www.theinformation.com/articles/coreweave-faces-reality-check-bullish-growth-forecasts?rc=kz8jh3 The Financial Times: CoreWeave tests investor risk appetite with $7.5bn in looming debt repayments https://www.ft.com/content/163c6927-2032-4346-857e-8e3787e4babc Bloomberg: OpenAI Close to Finalizing Its $40 Billion SoftBank-Led Funding https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2025-03-26/openai-close-to-finalizing-its-40-billion-softbank-led-funding My Newsletter: CoreWeave Is A Time Bomb https://www.wheresyoured.at/core-incompetency/ --- LINKS: https://www.tinyurl.com/betterofflinelinks Newsletter: https://www.wheresyoured.at/ Reddit: https://www.reddit.com/r/BetterOffline/  Discord: chat.wheresyoured.at Ed's Socials: https://twitter.com/edzitron https://www.instagram.com/edzitron https://bsky.app/profile/edzitron.com https://www.threads.net/@edzitron See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. 5k3d2e